Honest?!

I am innately poor at all things shopping.

Should I enter Saninsbury's with the intention of purchasing a brace of granny'smiths delights - you can guarantee I will instead end up at the till with 1lb of Icelandic kiwi's, some baby oil and a copy of razzle.

None of these items in any way being connected I should just add.


Still, recognising this shortcoming I either attempt to avoid any and all establishments selling anything- or alternatively palm the job off onto somebody else.

However, as naive as I am, there are those rare occasions when, avoid as you might, the opportunity arises when you have no choice but to enter the world of consumption. As a direct consequence of this, and to provide some educational bathroom reading - I therefore subscribe to the magazine 'Which'.

For those unfamiliar with the reference, the glossy in question provides what I assumed to be an unbiased and invaluable insight into the most competitive, cost effective and reliable good or service available from most good stockists. The monthly publication offers guidance and advice on a variety of items from current accounts to ISA's, washing machines to online camera's.

One month they may send under-cover representatives to assess the scoff and service of a particular hotel,; another time they may ask a number of folks to compare and critically evaluate unsecured loans provided by major high street banks.

The eventual aim being to establish the best products available at the most competitive rate.

Simple principle and lets be fair, not a bad idea.

However, reliant upon their advice to minimise the time spent shopping, I was a little disconcerted when reading the latest copy. Page 7 contains an interview with Nick Clegg, the gentleman illustrated in the piccy and also MP, leader of the Lib Dem's and burner of cacti across the land. Ignoring the irony of a mp charged to write a full page article for an 'independent' publication on helping consumers attain best value for money, I hastily flicked through the pages previously skimmed:

1. Article on going green and how to reduce the temp of the washing machine whilst preserving the quality of the cycle.

2. Few piccies and pages on digital radio.

3. 'A rambling discussion on Which' (do you see what they've done there) car to purchase.

4. Someone discussing the all important topic of gardening tools.

5. Something and really nothing about labels on food, and;

6. A bit of un-educated advice relating to which bank is best to invest your soon to be administered cash.

What do they all have in common? Performance Indicators & kick starting the ailing economy.

Really. Its fucking farce. I want my cash back. Perhaps I should approach their research team.

Ponder fucking ponder.